Trash

Aw, man... Here we go. Everybody got an opinion. Yeah. I know. She changed her story twice before I finished my drink, then looked me dead in the face like, “Now what do you think?” I said, “That ain’t how it happened.” She said, “According to who?” Next thing I know, she got me explaining my story to you. Now I ain’t no fool. Not full-time. She said, “You sure?” ...Girl, never mind. I know what she’s doing. Hell, she know I know. Still took me twenty minutes just to tell that girl to go. Man. That right there? Trash. My boys been saying it. My mama said it twice. Bartender saw us carrying on and started giving some advice. I said, “Hey man, I got it.” He laughed and said, “Do you?” ...Good point. I’m through! Take out the trash! (Take it out!) Take out the trash! (Get it gone!) Bag fulla trouble and it runs that mouth, ain’t nothin’ left but to drag that out. Take out the trash! (That’s trash!) Take out the trash! (Oh, yeah!) She can shake that ass, she can make me laugh... Still trash. Take it out! Caught her telling my cousin some mess I never said. I’m like, “Where’d you get that idea?” Then she pointed at her head. Said, “Boy, I know how you think.” Shook my head, “Girl, Apparently not.” She goes, “See! There you go.” I said, “Doing what?” She laughed. I laughed. Damn. That set me back. Even my brotha’ said, “Man, take out the trash.” I shrugged and called, “Would y’all relax?” “Man, I’m handling my business.” He came back, “Brotha’, you been handling it since damn near Christmas.” Okay. Now everybody funny. I know what y’all hear. I know what y’all see. I got eyes too. Difference is, she ain’t looking at y’all the way she looking at— (beep—) ... Never mind. Take it out. Take out the trash! (Take it out!) Take out the trash! (Get it gone!) Bag fulla trouble and it runs that mouth, ain’t nothin’ left but to drag that out. Take out the trash! (That’s trash!) Take out the trash! (Oh, yeah!) She can shake that ass, she can make me laugh... Still trash. Take it out! Finally got her moving, thought I had it under control. My boy goes, “Don’t lose focus.” She turned around, sassed him, “Why he always in our business?” I’m like, “See? That right there.” She goes, “What?” I told her, “Keep walking.” She laughed, kept talking, and somehow slowed down.Man. Taking out the trash should not take this long. Take out the trash! (Take it out!) Take out the trash! (Get it gone!) Bag fulla trouble and it runs that mouth, ain’t nothin’ left but to drag that out. Take out the trash! (That’s trash!) Take out the trash! (Oh, yeah!) She can shake that ass, she can make me laugh... Still trash. Take it out! Alright. I heard y’all. This time... I'm doin' it. My boy said, “You said that last week.” I shrugged, “This time I mean it.” He came back, “That what you said last time.” I told him, “Man, quit keeping receipts.” He goes, “I ain’t keeping nothing. You keep bringing her back.” I said, “That’s not what happened.” He looks over, “Then what you call that?” I said, “Man, she got ways.” He laughed, “Yeah, okay.” I’m like, “Why everybody got jokes today?” Then he goes, “Because you been taking out the same trash since May.” Man... Alright. I hear ya! Take out the trash! (Take it out!) Take out the trash! (Get it gone!) Tie that bag, don’t turn around, if it start talking... don’t put it back down! Take out the trash! (That’s trash!) Take out the trash! (Keep it moving!) Looking that good oughta come with a fine... Still trash. Take it out! Take it out! (Trash!) Take it out! (Trash!) I said take it out! (Trash!) Yeah, yeah, I’m taking it Quit rushing me. (Trash!) I heard you! Yeah. There she goes. Mm-hm. Still fine, too. Damn shame. Now somebody come get this trash before I change my mind.