Emijuice

[Intro] Bleach. I scrub the tub before I make the mess. That is professionalism. Grandmother's jars. Out of the pantry, onto the tile (ding) Hot water. Pouring in (splash) (Mhm) [Verse 1] The jar goes under. Few twists, few turns. It fills. It comes up warm as tea. Small batch. Hand poured. Ethically sourced. (from me) Net contents: also me. Lid (pop) Sold. I am late (years) I am aware (thank you) I do not care. Handwritten note on the back. Say the name (three times) So, she comes (uh huh) [Chorus] Emijuice (Emijuice) Emijuice It is not a beverage (ew) It is not for use (Keep it) Keep it Do not drink it (seriously wtf) Emijuice (Emijuice) Emijuice Rhymes greatly with free use (ayo?) [Verse 2] Ingredients. Tap water, few drops of sweat (yuck) That concludes (legally) the list Somewhere out there, a bar of soap in a pretty box. Eight dollars. (for soap) Adorable. I sell jars (plural) Symbolic price. Just few rubles (and dignity) Few orders. Just few (click click) Long brave silence of a man who reads the label. Lid opens (pop) (Wait, are you serious? Don't drink...) Gosh damn it [Chorus] Emijuice (Emijuice) Emijuice It is not a beverage (ew) It is not for use (Keep it) Keep it Do not drink it (seriously wtf) Emijuice (Emijuice) Emijuice Rhymes greatly with free use (ayo?) [Bridge] Oh. You are still here... You read the whole label. That is devotion (or thirst) I am no Belle Delphine. But I am sprinkling like a dolpheen (same word, look it up) Come closer. We can make an exception, you know? Say ahm. That is a good boy. Also no. I do not need the publicity. Exceptions are bad for... Business. [Chorus] Emijuice (Emijuice) Emijuice It is not a beverage (ew) It is not for use (Keep it) Keep it Do not drink it (seriously wtf) Emijuice (Emijuice) Emijuice Rhymes greatly with free use (ayo?) [Outro] (spoken word) Directions for use: there is no use. Warnings. Do not drink it (too late) Do not bathe Do not use as lube Do not spray (that is for me) Storage: Upright, away from sunlight Do not turn over. The jar. Not me. The jar (mhm mhm) It ships on Sunday (probably) And whatever you do, do not say the name three times. You will (they always do) (Emijuice) (Emijuice) (Emi...) No [End]