The Good, the Bad, and the Syrupy (Kevin’s Edit, Apparently)

I'm just a llama... Blue 'cause life hurts... I warned him... Bob licked that damned gravy boat anyway. They say when you outrun a curse... you better not look back. But Bob looked back. Of course Bob looked back. ...and I smelled syrup. ...and heard... chewing. We'd barely made it out alive... from that cursed Waffle House summoning. Still smolderin'. Emotionally sticky. ...And there he was. Chewin' on stolen waffles... like it was a Tuesday. A little ferret-thing... in a hoodie... and too many rings. Wearin' a Waffle House tag... definitely stolen... that said Kevin... Lookin' at me... like I was the problem. I said, "Bob. Who is that?" And that thing looked up and said..."Kevin." Bob shrugged, "His name's Kevin... Apparently." This is my life now. Glowing snail, haunted diner, waffle thief with smug little eyes. I don’t sleep, I just blink slow, whisper This is my life now. Kevin nodded… Dipped his waffle in syrup. Like he knew what he was doing. …He probably did. He said he followed us from the club, "Because y'all looked like a vibe." Then he yawned. And unzipped a bag of more waffles... Where did he even get them? Bob shrugged. Of course he did. Kevin winked. I reconsidered everything... Including existence. He said, "Wasn't me that cursed the place... Well... not only me." Then he burped syrup. And the streetlamp flickered. And I swear the shadows applauded. This is my life now... I reckon... All-night breakfast survivors... and cryptid ferrets with opinions. I'm just tryin' to get to Wednesday... Bob's already adopted him emotionally. This is my life now. This ain't background music... it's how I scream... And Kevin... Kevin just stole my toast. I used to be a llama with a plan. Now I travel with chaos in a hoodie. His name's Kevin. Apparently.