LARP

[record scratch] Magic Missile! Lightning, bro! Magic Missile! Lightning, ho! I'm larping, I'm with my dork friends eating pork rinds cuz I been staying fit and stayin with the times Now I'm at the gate, the fuckin dragons gate, And they asked who are you? I'm like, I'm a mom's son, the fuckin chosen one lets fuck some women I'm here to kill the dragon and then collect the gems They're like, Hmm, we gotta let him in When they let me in, I'm looking around Everyone's looking at me like I'm a god damn clown They all Who is this person? He's not even from our town I'm like, Yo, yo, relax, don't fuckin worry, I will protect you, I got these pork rinds, and also too besides, I will lead us to the main prize [record scratch] Magic Missile! Lightning, bro! Magic Missile! Lightning, ho! And the guy's like, "Bruh there's a dragon on the mountain" I said, "A dragon on the mountain?" He like, "Yeah, dude, dragon on the mountain" I said, "Bring me my sword and I'll defeat it" He said, "Dude I ain't got your sword, that's your secret" I'm like, "What's the secret?" he said, "It's on the mountain" So I ran to the mountain and at the top there he was I was surrounded The dragon looked at me and he was like [scream] AaaAAAAAAAAahhhhjh! The dragon went hhhaAAAAAAAaahh! [scream] AaaAAAAAAAAahhhhjh! The dragon went hhhaAAAAAAAaahh! [Bridge] Aw fuck son of a bitch what the fuck [--------wait-----] I don't know how this works, I don't know what to do Dude ain't even real, bruh, and then said "What the fuck who are you?" Yo, right then this mother fucker he took off his dragon head, took off his dragon head took off his dragon head, bro was real mad I mean, larping is fun, but that stuff was actually kind of scary, you know? It was kind of like Game of Thrones out there I didn't know what was going on, high as fuck, I was scared, man Like when they was talking about a dragon, I thought they was just pretending But then I saw the dragon, I'm like, "Oh my god, there's a dragon, bro" Like I didn't know what to do, like I was frozen [scream] AaaAAAAAAAAahhhhjh! Magic Missile! Lightning, bro! The dragon went hhhaAAAAAAAaahh! Magic Missile! Lightning, bro! And the dragon like ffrrraAAAAAAAahhhAh! I know I said I was the chosen one I ain't the chosen one to be killing dragons, you know? I'm more like the chosen one to like do your taxes or something So I ended up running down the mountain, And when I saw my friends And they was like, "Yo, what happened? Where's the dragon?" And I'm like, "I don't know!" They was like, "Did you kill it?" I'm like, "No, I got too stoned and thought it was real, son!" [Outro] [scream] AaaAAAAAAAAahhhhjh! Magic Missile! Lightning, bro! The dragon went hhhaAAAAAAAaahh! Magic Missile! Lightning, bro! And the dragon like ffrrraAAAAAAAahhhAh! Magic Missile! Lightning, bro! The dragon went hhhaAAAAAAAaahh! Magic Missile! Lightning, bro! And the dragon like ffrrraAAAAAAAahhhAh!