I'll Never Know

I don't know just where I'm going Gonna aim for contentment if I can 'Cause it makes me feel like I'm human When I snap the pill and numb the pain And I tell you things don't feel the same Yeah, when I'm high up on my run I feel as light and bright as the sun When my thoughts start to fade When I breathe without more pain You all can't help me, if you care Not even my girl, pretty words and hair You all can go take a fuckin' walk somewhere Xannies Be the death of me Benzodiazepines Take all the bad away from me Blue crumbs on my tongue remain Ten seconds 'til I taste it in my veins Just one more bitter pill and then I'll be better off than dead Bliss hits the center of my head Clicks into place, I can smile again Yeah, I'm as good as dead And I'm glad that I'm not aware Yeah, so that I don't have to care And I'm not even scared 'Cause I just can't care I'll never know I'll never know And I will never know If I would still be alive If I'd been one bar short last night