Chips, Chips, Chips

[INTRO] [Voice: Female: exaggerated Valley Girl, breathy, incredulous, playful disgust, rising pitch] Oh my God, are you a double dipper? [Voice: Female: Valley Girl, horrified, disgusted whisper, drawn-out emphasis] That's disgusting. [HOOK] [Voice: male lead, energetic, rhythmic, playful, punchy delivery] Chips, chips, chips Dip! Dip that chip! Dip those chips! [VERSE 1] [Voice: male lead, cocky, conversational, slightly exaggerated confidence] Ruffles have ridges. They hold that dip just right, So I can shove it in my chip hole, aight. Best chip for dip! Why'd I lie? I'm gonna eat the whole damn bag tonight. Thick enough to not be constantly breaking, I especially love the dip with bacon. [BRIDGE] [Voice: male lead, increasingly excited, rapid-fire, building ridiculous enthusiasm] Onion dip! Cheese dip! Bean dip! Chili dip! Ranch dip! Jalapeño dip! [Voice: sudden skeptical hesitation, questioning emphasis] Salsa!? [Voice: dismissive, emphatic] Fuck that, dip! [Voice: rapid-fire, increasingly manic] Dip, dip, dip, dip! [Voice: shouted, triumphant] Dip that mother-loving chip! [Voice: deadpan realization, slightly breathless] I got love handles now. [HOOK] [Voice: male lead, energetic, rhythmic, playful, punchy delivery] Chips, chips, chips! Dip! Dip that chip! Dip those chips! [VERSE 2] [Voice: male lead, increasingly gluttonous, confident, playful swagger] Dill pickle dip, sour cream and chive, This high-sodium diet keeps my soul alive. Seven-layer dip stacked up so high, Wipe the grease right out of my eye. Warm crab dip, sweet onion jam, Eating out the tub like a savage I am. If it's liquid or creamy, I don't discriminate, Load up the chip, clean off the plate. [Voice: suddenly concerned, looking around, comedic panic] What am I gonna do with all this damn dip? [Voice: frustrated realization, emphatic] I should've bought two bags of chips! [HOOK] [Voice: male lead, full energy, rhythmic, increasingly frantic] Chips, chips, chips! Dip! Dip that chip! Dip those chips! [OUTRO] [Voice: male lead, confused, breathless, realizing what just happened] Did I just eat that whole bag? [Voice: desperate, thirsty, increasingly frantic] Somebody get me some Fanta. [Voice: exhausted, completely parched, comedic final emphasis] I'm fucking parched.